jAnicE

knowing myself in a big pressure,its the time for me to make some changes of myself…i almost cried when i cant do it..it is agony not knowing what to do..haih…but somehow i still believe i can do i..how time flies huh? its been exactly two months im studying in kl..a new world for me..looking into this modernized city, i tried to adapt with it…with traffic congestion around, public transports available, i still prefer my hometown..but it is impossible for me to b in my hometown studying…i’m going to reach 20 soon..and its humiliating for me to keep on studying secondary o pre-u studies right? ehehe…when it comes to university life,my life is no longer easy as i used to be..being a university student, i cant b fooling around and enjoying myself because it is the time and place to determine my future…a place to release my tension is not available here..perhaps i will try my new way of releasing my tension…:) i hope i can overcome a full load of assignments and exams..i just hope for the best in my life….without my gang around me, i still can feel they are just beside me…let us pray hard ok?? do your best guys…dont let anything affect all of you..miss u guys..muacksss….

i cant help with it..but i do not know what to do with myself..im feeling down these few days..maybe because i started to feel the pressure on both of my shoulders…i promised myself to be prepared to face any obstacles that are coming on my way.no matter it is small or big matter… i try to get used to it..learn to give and take..as well learn to relax my mind.i hv to learn to release tension wen i need too..the life im having now is no longer a life with relaxation and easy going…im not longer a small girl..i hv grown up to b independent and learn to solve the problems on my own…perhaps it is one of a good way to make myself feel useful to the society one day..

i love to do it..but why must it be alot of problems occured to me when im starting to do it?? i enjoyed my lectures n practicals very much..and i even have the initiative to finish all of them at home..and all of a sudden the version im using is not suitable for me???? ishhh….fed up~~~

i could not believe i’m already in kl studying my favourite course…i could not imagine myself being able to get transferred to kl to pursue my degree course…im in kl for the fifth day already..and i’m here to tell you what i did in kl for the past few days..

~1st day

when i reached here, i could not expect the place im staying here is not bad…lrt station and shophouses are a few miles away from me.i can walk from my condo to lrt station..and there is a shopping centre for me to shop for my groceries whenever i need it..a friend of mine took me to have my dinner at nearby shophouses..i also went to have a walk in the nearby shopping complex too..

~2nd day

i went to the university where i’m studying..the environment is not bad. jus i still prefer kampar’s campus…much better than this one..i went for lectures and found out the course i’m studying is interesting.. i went back at 4pm and continued doing my revision. i told myself not to be lazy anymore..i must start doing revision each time my lectures end.

~3rd day

as usual, early in the morning, i went to library to study and do my tutorials… i spent my time wisely..and i just appreciate the time because i dont want to regret for not studying..:) that day, i chatted with my sister, mummy and aunt..we talked nonsense a lot.. i miss my home..cos after all i still feel taiping is the best place for me..i’m trying to adapt to the new environment right here..

~4rd day

normal day for me..nothing much to write about

~5th day

i finished my class early. i managed to go to pavilion after my lecture ended.nice and huge place..:) get to see my favourite bakery over there..ehehe…and jamie, u must have your cream puff over there.. i will wait for u.. ehe =)

it was the day that i had my worst luck of my life…neither my friends nor me will expect such things could happen…and it just happened in a glance…my favourite nike bag n my LATEST handphone were gone FOREVER!!!  not to say that im bad but how i wish the guy will meet with an accident and died or caught by the police~~~ and thanks to all my beloved friends who were there to give me support and showed their concern…thanks alot….and im sorry for ruining everything… see you soon guys.. take care….

you will never know what might happen…it just upset me at this moment..im just trying to be good..and you see what happen in the end??? im so sorry…next time i wont b the good person anymore… whatever favour you ask for, i wont help anymore…t is not easy to b a good person after all… being a bad person will be much easier… right now, right moment, I WONT HELP ANYMORE!!!!~~~~~

i have learnt something today..learn to treasure yourself before you want to tresure your loved ones…i have learnt to study the new world..world of adults after graduating from high school…life’s never easy as normally younger generation think….don always think parents are responsible for everything we have done…we also have to bear our own responsiblities as well…as i have learnt to work during these free periods while waiting for results, i get to know dofferent kinds of people…from my friends to customers…the colleagues who are always by my side to give me moral support, advice gave me time to learn the new world i’m going to enter soon…dont always judge people by its colour…dont always discriminate people by skin colours..i have learnt alot of things from them though we are from different races..but we are Malaysians right?? i get to know life after marriage, people who are in love, how people suffer from breakups, and happy endings as well…i also get to know how important my family is…without them, i wouldnt be here today…thanks for their moral support, financial support as well wheni need them..they are the best people in my life….love them alot…i promise that i will fulfil your dreams and hopes…trust me okay?? muacksss…thanks guys…

why do these people exist?? y dun they jus let go? haihh…v cant simply ruin people’s life…haih..im pity and angry at the same time…:( i wish there is no revenge among each other..jus peace and harmony.. somehow i hope u have made th right decision…take care always..miss ya lotss..

it was a normal day for me..though its a school day, im not schooling anymore..i woke up at 7 and surprised that im late.. damn..luckily my dad fetched my sis to school…after then, i continued to sleep till 11..oh damn!! i forgot something… haih..never mind..i still can watch it in the net…:) then, i helped my aunt to cook..after cooking, i watched tv again..now u can see my lifestyle is rather boring…im agony not knowing what to do everyday… maybe go jogging in the evening? but im lazy to step out from my house…hmm..about 2.00pm, i went out to visit my aunt…i brought back some food to eat…my aunt cooked for me…damn..its really nice and delicious… i reached home about an hour later… there goes my day again…watching tv is the only thing i can do during free hours besides onlining… a moment later, natasha sms-ed me and asked me to accompany her…i told her that i have to reach home before 6pm… then, i fetched my sister for tuition… im such a stupid girl..im rushing to drop her on time and yet i used the wrong road..luckily i can still drop her on time…when i reached home, i watched tv again…after awhile, i finished all my housework… and too bad i cant go out with friends..too many things to do at home.. and i planned to sleep early…but i kept on rolling on the bed because i could not sleep…the whole night i could not sleep because i slept too much that day…there goes my boring day…

new year - new resolutions…there’s alot of wishes i want them to come true..and i really hope it will really come true.. god please bless each and everyone a happy new year…and stay happy always… my beloved jamie, aim to get your straight A’s in your spm..make daddy, mummy, brother and sister proud of you…and i trully believe that you can do it girl.. i wish my brother can achieve his dream.. =) and all my wishes will always remain in my heart..and im not to tell anyone about them unless any of them come true…may god bless everyone with good health… muaxxx